Friday, April 29, 2005

Define "Academic Freedom" Please...

Question: Doesn't equal mean "the same on both sides?"
Answer: It depends on what the meaning of "equal" is.

A history professor that teaches (rightfully) all of the standard white-on-black racism, gets in trouble when he attempts to distribute examples of black-on-white racism. Read an excerpt on "Sweet Spirits of Ammonia."

Sweet Spirits of Ammonia: What Academic Freedom?

As Bob questions, "Where is the ACLU?" To quote (almost) an old saying "What's good for the drake is good for the duck."

Tuesday, April 26, 2005 - Last Syrian troops leave Lebanon - Apr 26, 2005

I can't add anything more to this announcement. - Last Syrian troops leave Lebanon - Apr 26, 2005:
"The last Syrian soldiers have left Lebanon, surrendering to international and Lebanese popular demands and ending its 29-year military presence in its smaller neighbor."

Watcher of Weasels

Watcher of Weasels

As you may or may not already be aware, members of the Watcher's Council hold a vote every week on what they consider to be the most link-worthy pieces of writing around... per the Watcher's instructions, I am submitting one of my own posts, "Predictions on the Future of the MSM", for consideration in the upcoming nominations process.

Here is the most recent winning council post, here is the most recent winning non-council post, here is the list of results for the latest vote, and here is the initial posting of all the nominees that were voted on.

I will let you know the outcome.

Update on Dan Fogelberg

Dan Fogelberg, one of my personal favorite singer/song writers, was diagnosed with prostrate cancer in the summer of 2004. I have been trying to find more information on his progress but the latest I could find was on his own official site. The release linked below says:
''The reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated'. I am undergoing treatment and we are very encouraged by the progress I am making. I would like to express my regret over the cancellation of my fall tour and thank my wonderful fans for all their prayers and heartfelt good wishes. I would also personally like to request that our privacy and the privacy of our families be respected. If there is any news that I wish to make known to the public, it will be posted here or released officially through HK Management.”"

Dan Fogelberg ~ News.

There is some word that he may have considered a concert in the spring of this year but I could not confirm that.

Your friendly ignited drake grew up in Colorado so Dan's music was perfectly tailored for me and my tree hugging friends. His "Netherlands" album was one of the first albums that I bought (along with BTO and Chicago) when I made money mowing yards. Dan Fogelberg is also a superb concert artist. I have attended two of his "Dan Fogelberg Solo Acoustic Tours." He is the only artist that I have seen perform live more than once.

Though my musical tastes have changed over the years, Dan Fogelberg will always have a warm spot in my heart. Here's wishing him the best of luck in his continued fight against cancer.

Monday, April 25, 2005

Michelle Malkin Uses the Flaming Duck Question and Answer Style

Actually she uses this effective technique on occassion (but I had to quack about the similarity between a REALLY good blog and your humble ignited drake's occasional rants.)

Anyway, the post is worth reading as it shows the subtle shading that occurs when a liberal MSM finds a republican that agrees with them. Read the post:


Sunday, April 24, 2005

Help the Poor. Don't Keep Them Poor!

Question: How much effort does it take to teach someone to fish?
Answer: I don't know. I'm a duck!

Lao Tzu, a 6th century B.C. Chinese philosopher once said:
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.

According to Bono, 21 century A.D. Irish philosopher, it should say.
I want YOU to give this man a fish today and tomorrow and everyday from now on. To heck with teaching him to fish.

The Daily Demarche is my source for information on foreign aid and Dr. Demarche has another great post. You can read it at:
The Daily Demarche: Bono to Canada: Give us more fish!

I propose that we do the things required to solve the problem. Who's with me?

Predictions on the Future of the MSM

Question: What killed the MSM?
Answer: Word of mouth.

George Will quotes statistics on the consumption of media and the future doesn't look bright for the Main Stream Media. Read the column in the NY Post.

New York Post Online Edition:

Will contends that it’s a loss of respect that doomed the MSM. He also ties the MSM's decided liberal bias to that loss of respect. Personally, I feel that this may be the reason people began to look towards other outlets but it does not adequately explain the complete picture. A loss of respect is not what doomed the MSM. One can almost always recover from a loss of respect (politicians do it all the time) but I don't think that there is any way that old time media outlets can save the genre. So what's the difference? The MSM is in the same position as buggy whip makers of yesteryear. No amount of advertising could have saved the whip makers because there were profound changes in the structure of their market. The MSM lives and dies on being the sole distributor of news and there are just too many structural changes in the way news can be distributed. Let me explain.

It is a fallacy to think that the MSM had a monopoly over the distribution of news. The true distribution channel for news is, and always has been, word of mouth. Think about the events of September 11, 2001. How many of us were watching TV or listening to the radio during the actual attacks? I know I wasn't. But there was one secretary listening to the radio. I heard her talking about the report and quickly informed others. The reason we give the MSM credit for being the purveyors of news is that it used to have a monopoly on access to the news events themselves. The MSM was able to place reporters at important events and then only television, radio and print outlets had the capital to create and distribute news reports. But now, Internet access is fairly ubiquitous. We no longer need a single reporter to create a report. We have dozens of people who are willing and able, because of the Internet, to talk about the events in real time. An excellent example is the recent incident of Peter Tan who blogged during an earthquake. We can now get the report directly into the most efficient distribution channel, word of mouth. Soon, we simply will not need the big media outlets.

(hat tip Sweet Spirits of Ammonia)

Saturday, April 23, 2005

The Oil for Food Mystery

No real answers but lots of interesting connections in the Oil for Food scandal.

Belmont Club The Imperial Judiciary: How to Respond

Professor Bainbridge never fails to get the brain cells of your friendly ignited drake churning. In this post, the professor use's his own thoughts and a Krauthammer column to propose a truly comprehensive fix to the problem of judicial activism. It made me rethink my support of the so-called "nuclear option." Read the whole post below. The Imperial Judiciary: How to Respond

Friday, April 22, 2005

My Inner European

Question: Was there ever any doubt that your ignited drake would be Russian?
Answer: Not really.

Your Inner European is Russian!

Mysterious and exotic.

You've got a great balance of danger and allure.

Who's Your Inner European?

Russia. What a fascinating place! I am so glad that my inner European was not French (like my friend over at WitNit!)

With just a little research on the Internet, I was also able to find a Russian folk tale about a duck (many thanks to So without further adu, I present the tale of....

The White Duck

There was once a prince who married a most beautiful princess, but he had not yet had time to feast his eyes on her to his heart's content or to have enough of talking to and hstening to her when the time came for them to part, for he had to go on a far journey. What was to be done! The princess wept and the prince, who kept begging her not to, bade her, since he was leaving her with strangers. never to leave her chambers, to avoid the company of wicked people and to close her ears to wicked talk. This the princess promised to do, and as soon as the prince had gone, she locked herself in her chamber.

One day a woman, who seemed a simple and kindly soul enough, came to see the princess. "Why should you eat your heart out!" said she. "Why don't you at least go out for a walk in the garden and have a breath of fresh air?" At first the princess would not hear of it, but then, telling herself that a walk in the garden could do her no harm, she went outside. Now. in the garden was a stream with the freshest, clearest spring water ever seen. "It's very hot today," the woman said, "and the water is nice and cool. So why don't you take a dip?" "No, no, I can't do that!" the princess said, but then she took off her gown and stepped into the water. And the woman at once struck her on the back, and saying "Be a white duck and swim in the water!", turned her into a white duck.

After that the witch, for that was what the woman was. took the princess's shape, put on the princess's gown, combed her hair, painted her cheeks and brows and sat down to wait for the prince. By and by a pup yelped, a bell tinkled, and there was the prince at the gate! The witch rushed out to meet him, she embraced and kissed him, and the prince, who was overcome with joy, pressed her to his heart.

And as for the white duck, she laid three eggs, and out of them three babies were hatched, three boys, two of them fine, sturdy little lads, and the third, a tiny little thing. Their mother took good care of them and they grew quickly and were soon splashing about and catching fish, which now became their favourite dish, jumping out on the bank for a look at the lea, a place which they found very pleasant to see, and were nothing loath to make shirts of cloth. "Don't go far, children!" the mother said. But the three boys would not listen to her and with each passing day went farther away. One day they wandered even farther away than usual and found themselves in the prince's courtyard. The witch knew at once who they were and gnashed her teeth in anger. She got them to come inside, gave them food and drink and put them to bed, and then ordered fires to be kindled, kettles to be hung and knives sharpened. The two bigger lads lay down and fell fast asleep, but the third, the tiny one, whom one or the other of them kept always in his bosom lest he catch cold, did not sleep and saw and heard everything. In the middle of the night the witch came to the door of their chamber and called: "Are you asleep, my little ones?" And Tiny called back:

We cannot sleep for the thoughts that chill us;
We dare not sleep, for they mean to kill us-
Fires are being kindled,
Kettles are being hung,
Knives are being sharpened!

"They're not asleep!" the witch told herself. She went away, took a walk and then came back to the door of their chamber again. "Are you asleep, my little ones?" she called. But Tiny called back again:

We cannot sleep for the thoughts that chill us;
We dare not sleep, for they mean to kill us-
Fires are being kindled,
Kettles are being hung,
Knives are being sharpened!

"Why is it that one and the same voice answers me?" thought the witch. She opened the door quietly, and, seeing that the two brothers were sound asleep, passed a dead man's hand cut off at the wrist over them so that they might never wake.

In the morning the white duck called to her children, but they did not reply, and her heart told her that evil had befallen them. She flew to the prince's court-yard, and there were her sons, their faces white as snow and their bodies cold as ice, lying side by side. She rushed to them, her wings outspread, and called out in a human voice:

Quack-quack, my sons,
Quack-quack, my beloved ones,
In want I reared you,
With tears I suckled you,

You slept-1 lay sleepless.
You ate-1 went hungry.

"Did you ever hear the like. Wife?" the prince asked. "The duck is speaking in a human voice." "It only seems so to you," the witch told him. "Ho there, all! Drive the duck out of the yard!" The servants chased the duck away, but it flew round and round and dropped down beside her children again.

Quack-quack, my sons.
Quack-quack, my beloved ones!

she called again.

The witch it was that put you to sleep,
The witch it was with her wicked ways,
For a snake is she and a deadly one...
From you she took your father own,
Your father own and my own dear spouse;
She drowned us all in the river swift,
She turned us all into white-winged ducks,
And herself she lives like a princess true!

"Ah, so that is the truth of it!" said the prince, and he called to his servants telling them to catch the duck. They rushed to do his bidding, but the duck flew round and round and would not be caught. But when the prince went after her himself she came down of her own free will and dropped into his hands. He took her by the wing and said: "Rise behind me, a white birch! Stand before me, a fair maid!"

And lo!-a white birch rose behind him and a fair maid stood in front of him, and she was none other but his own dear wife.

They then caught a magpie, and, tying two vials to its wings, bade it fill one with living water and the other with talking water. Away flew the magpie and was soon back with the living and the talking water. They sprinkled their sons with the living water, and the lads started and came back to life; they sprinkled them with the talking water, and they began talking and laughing.

And so now the prince has his whole family with him, and they never had cause to shed a tear and prospered the more from year to year. Never more to return was the evil past, and they could be happy together at last. And as for the witch, she was tied to a horse's tail and the horse sent across a field. Where the witch's leg came off, there a poker appeared; where her arm was severed, there lay a rake; where her head rolled down, there a burdock grew up. The birds came flying up, and they pecked the flesh; the winds swept up, and they bore off the bones. And nothing was left of the wicked witch, neither trace nor word nor memory.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

From the Files of "The Most Ridiculous Cloutier"

Question: Have you ever heard of the Church of Body Modification?
Answer: Neither have I.

But we may hear more about it soon if the Supreme Court decides to hear the case of a woman fired from Costco for wearing an eyebrow ring.

Sweet Spirits of Ammonia: Keeping Holey

(Now, where did I put my slippery slope...)

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Air America Sinking?

Question: What makes successful talk radio?
Answer: Air America doesn't know either!

Liberals have never really understood talk radio. All they hear is what they want to hear. They see a stereotypical angry white guy and they do not understand the message. Further, they can't even come close to understanding how to broadcast political talk in a manner that is a commercial success. Brian C. Anderson in a LA Times column titled "Why the Liberals Can't Keep Air America From Spiraling In" has a pretty good explanation of what is missing from Air America. (hat tip: WitNit)

Happy Earth Day from Cox & Forkum

These guys are great. What a way to celebrate the bounty of Mother Earth.

Cox & Forkum: Earth Day

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

ProfessorBainbridge: Andrew Sullivan is an Ass

What he said! Yeah. Andrew Sullivan is an Ass

The "Foxidation" of MSM News

Question: What do you say to someone who thinks "the sky is falling"?
Answer: Nothing. They will go away soon because their sky IS falling.

William Raspberry has an interesting column on the impact that Fox News Channel is having on the MSM news. Raspberry comes out swinging in the first three paragraphs:
The in-your-face right-wing partisanship that marks Fox News Channel's news broadcasts is having two dangerous effects.

The first is that the popularity of the approach -- Fox is clobbering its direct competition (CNN, CNBC, MSNBC, etc.) -- leads other cable broadcasters to mimic it, which in turn debases the quality of the news available to that segment of the TV audience.

The second, far more dangerous, effect is that it threatens to destroy public confidence in all news.
Raspberry then presents the meat of the argument contending that Fox News is contributing to the "dumbing down" of all news programs and that this trend will reduce the confidence people have in "legitimate" news organizations.

On Poliblogger, Dr. Steven Taylor looks at the column in a post titled "Not With a Fox" (Nice allusion to Dr. Seuss, Dr. Taylor especially considering that "Green Eggs and Ham" is about someone unwilling to try something new because it looks different!). Dr. Taylor points to the problems with Raspberry's analysis methodology:
"However, as with most critics of FNC, it seems that he is comparing apples to oranges (although it unclear as to what he is comparing, as he gives no specifics) insofar as much of Fox’s programs are commentary programs, not straight news (which is also true of MSNBC, for that matter–and it isn’t as if CNN is pure news)."
While neither author presents anything earth shattering, I find it amusing that neither acknowledges the simple market forces at work. More people are watching Fox News because they find that it fills a niche not filled anywhere else, which is the definition of a market force. Your friendly ignited drake watches Fox News (though the thought of relying on a "fox" always gives me the willies!) because it provides commentary (not news) that is more in line with my own views. As to the news aspect of the channel, regardless of what Raspberry thinks, the news is "Fair and Balanced" unlike the MSM becasue it actually presents the conservative side. That's refreshing and I don't find myself furiously quacking at the TV like I do with some other channels. It also tends to continue reporting on the stories that interest me, like the Oil for Food scandal, that drop too quickly off of the MSM radar.

So Fox News will continue to be the official news channel of The Flaming Duck. On occasion, I will watch both CNN and MSNBC, but it's mostly for the entertainment value. I mean who can really take them seriously! And with that I give a big raspberry to William Raspberry. >@

Candy Bar Countries?

Witnit has too much time on his hands (by his own admission) but he has found his muse this time! Read .:. WitNit .:.: Candy Bar Countries and allow yourself to chuckle.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Intelligence v. Wisdom Redux

Previously, on "The Flaming Duck"...

Sorry, I just had to say that.

A couple of days ago, I created a post about the difference between wisdom and intelligence. In it, I contend that intelligence is about thinking deeply and seeking knowledge (all laudable goals). Wisdom, though, is about synthesis. About using any knowledge you have and making it become "greater" than simple knowledge. Basically, I think that it is easy to think "too deeply" about any particular subject. When we do that, we lose the simplicity that only wisdom can see. More often than not, intelligence complicates; wisdom simplifies.

Well, I stumbled upon the ideal "intelligent" post. This post talks about happiness as a concept and makes some really interesting points. But I want to say;
This is an "intelligent" post but is it a "wise" post?
I would contend that the wisdom got lost in the intelligence.

For your further consideration,

  • Can someone appreciate "happiness" without going through the academic exercise that this author did?

  • If someone understands happiness without this academic exercise, are they still wise?

  • (and finally) If intelligent inquiry destroys your "happiness", is it worth it?

All I ask is that you don't call the ignited drake, "intelligent". I prefer to think of myself as "wise". At the very least, there certainly is no "quackery" here! >@

Chrenkoff - 2; Lefties - 0

First - Proof the people of Iraq want us to stick around.
New Poll from Iraq

Next - The people of Iraq need us to stick around.
More Bodies Found

Luckily, President Bush has the gonads to stick it out. Mistakes will be made but how can you argue with the outcome?

"I'll Take That Explosive Vest!"

Solomon at Solomonia has a little blurb about a Brtitish member of Parliament. Dr. Tonge can "empathize" with suicide bombers. Read the story here:

Lib Dem MP: Why I would consider being a suicide bomber


Update to Marc Fencil Post

Though I didn't post Marc's email address, the original article did. I understand that the address is bouncing but there is an update. You can email your thanks to Marc at:


(Hat tip to The Right Report)

Cox and Forkum and Mark Steyn on John Bolton

A couple of great comments on the process and the nominee.

Steyn: Bolton's just too hip for scaredy-cat Dems

Cox and Forkum: U.N. China Shoppe

Friday, April 15, 2005

Bovine Economics 101

Heard this little ditty before but it always bring a smile to my duck bill! I especially like the Enron corporation version.

Political Yen/Yang: Bovine Economics 101

Thursday, April 14, 2005

But Ya'll Knew That!

The Democrats no longer function as a true opposition party. Paul Mirengoff would like to see the Democratic Party actually step up to the plate and use the Bolton confirmation as a referendum on the efficacy of the U.N. Instead they talk about how Bolton treated his subordinates. Read his post at "Our feckless opposition party at work".

As an attorney, Paul Mirengoff knows the value of true opposition in moving the system forward. The Democratic Party no longer performs that function. But ya'll knew that already.

Two Stories About Schools

Question: What ties a minor story about cursing to a disgusting story about sexual assault?
Answer The reactions of the high school administrations.

A simple story about cursing run rampant in public schools in the same post as a story about the sexual assault of a disabled 16 year old girl in Ohio, tied together by the horrible reactions of school officials.

Let me be perfectly clear. I am not equating sexual assault to cursing so don’t even make that type of comment. What I would like to do is use both stories to comment on the state of school administrator in the United States. Please read both stories. Right now, I would like to quote from the article on cursing.
Teachers say their principals often don't give them support on the issue, and principals say they can't because administrators are worried about "bigger" problems. [like sexual assault – ed.] Many parents are no help, cursing themselves or excusing their children's outbursts, teachers say. And though many school systems ban profanity, not much happens to most offenders. Many teachers say they no longer bother reporting it.
The school environment that exists today is highly politically charged. I deal with school officials daily in my job. The politics on the school side are far and away much greater than the politics in the local government. Like any good politician, the cover-up of the sexual assault takes precedence over the correcting the cursing problem.

There are two roots to this current problem. First, schools rely on state and federal funding along with local tax dollars. When one takes the money, one must comply with the regulations. Second, schools exist in highly litigious environments where parents will sue for almost anything. This creates a culture of paranoia. Thus, School Boards all over the country are hiring administrators that can protect them from the perils that schools face today. Those perils do NOT stop at teaching grammar.

The two stories quoted in this post are perfect examples of the state of school administration today. “But I thought schools were about teaching our children,” you say. Not any more, my friend. Not anymore.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Beware of What You Ask For...

Question: Why has government become so intrusive?
Answer: Because we've asked for it.

Way back on March 7, I blogged about why we have the government that we asked for. In this post, Captain Ed makes the same point about our income tax structure. From the post:
"This points out an unfortunate dichotomy among
Americans who want reform without incurring a cost. "
Things like our tax structure don't just occur. They grow over time because we ask for them or because we fail to prevent them.

Just Keep Talking (Part 2)

Question: If someone wanted to totally discredit themselves, how would they do it?
Answer: They need only to look to the Democratic Party for guidance.

John Kerry whining about the election was Part 1. I now present Part 2 from Power Line in a post titled "Whose Side Are They On?"

Is it possible to pull back from this self-destructive behavior?

Monday, April 11, 2005

Liberals Upset? That's a Good Thing!

Minutemen, flags at half staff for the pope and checking Candian passports. It all adds up to grumbling liberals in the State Department. Read Dr. Demarche's post titled 'The President's "Tri-fecta"'.

From the post:
"I have to hand it to President Bush and his administration- I am not sure I have ever seen the liberal crowd in the State Department this shaken up."

Sentences like that even make a duck smile!

Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding.

Well, stupid joke fight fans. It's over. The epic stupid joke slugfest between the Flaming Duck and Witnit is finally over. When this fight started on April 8, no one could have predicted it would have gone this long. But two tough jokesters battled it out to the bitter end. And what an end! I've never seen a double knockout before!

Flaming Duck threw a vicious combination pun. But as the duck was winding up, WitNit threw his best combination yet.
  • A boy on the streetcorner pointed to a woman's pregnant belly and asked, 'What's that?' The woman replied, 'Well, that's my baby.' The boy asked, 'Do you love your baby?' The woman said, 'Of course I love my baby.' And the boy replied, 'Then how come you ate him?

  • What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo? Holes all over Australia.

  • My momma's so fat she affects the rotation of the earth.
While the duck had the right IDEAR, nothing was going to stop the kangaphant joke!

After the exchange, both fighters lie flat on the mat. The eight count came and went without a challenge by either jokester. The ref had no choice but to call a double knockout. The stupid joke fight officially ends in a draw!

Keep Talking, John. Just Keep Talking!

Dr. Steven Taylor warns that crazy talk like this actually:
...does damage to the Democratic Party because it continues to feed the idea that recent Democratic losses at the polls aren’t due to strategic errors on the part of the party, nor to weak candidates, but rather to some nefarious, nebulous Republican plot.

You should read the entire post titled "Kerry Whines Some More About 2004".

Another Duck in the Blogosphere!

Who'd a thunk!

Pond O' Plenty -- Various duck-related thoughts about non duck-related happentance

Sunday, April 10, 2005

A True "American" from Iran Named Armin

We have it too easy in the United States. We have lost sight of the simple truth that is all around us. Sometimes it takes someone with fresh eyes to give us a new perspective. Read "This guy is a conservative but doesnt know it". Maybe you will begin to see the truth again.

Flaming Duck - 5; WitNit - 4!

WitNit throws a flurry of stupidfunny jokes in the latest update to Test for Dementia. The first two were decent but didn't score well. Only the last landed a belly laugh. Flaming Duck's coordination between a stinging combo of three jokes put him into the lead.

The Flaming Duck seems to be slightly off his form. Normally stupid jokes are his stock and trade. Since he stepped into the ring with WitNit though, the jokes thrown were, well, they lacked either stupid or funny.
QUESTION: What do you call a deer without an eye?
ANSWER: No idear.

QUESTION: What do you call a deer without legs or eyes?
ANSWER: Still no idear.

Oh did you see that! The ignited drake threw a stupidstupid joke! Jokes must be clever but they must also be easy to understand and this one is definitely not easy to understand. I have no IDEAR why the duck threw that one. How will WitNit react to that?!

Cox & Forkum: Kofi's Last Stand

Ouch! This is "cutting" humor.

Cox & Forkum: Kofi's Last Stand

TTLB! Where have you gone?!


Dr. Steven Taylor in a post titled The Slow Death of the TTLB? wonders about the imminent demise of the TTLB. That would be tragic because the TTLB is the only reputation gauge that a small blog like the Flaming Duck has.

Luckily, N. Z. Bear responds with Mrs. Bear and Mr. M. Whew! I guess we can forgive NZ for a little thing like getting married. But don’t do that too often! (btw, Congrats)

Flaming Duck - 3; WitNit - 3!

Ladies and gentilemen! Just when it appeared that Witnit had the duck on the ropes, He couldn't put the ignited drake away! The duck answered grossness with grossness but it looks like Witnit confused "classic stupid" with "lame." Lets see the slow motion replay in the update to Test for Dementia.

Yes, Witnit only threw a lame lightbulb joke in return. Even stupid jokes have to carry some funny power. Now it looks like the Flaming Duck has gathered a second wind. He throws a wicked combination using his standard question and answer riddle technique.

Question: What do you call a cow with no legs?
Answer: Ground Beef.

Question: Where do you find the cow with no legs?
Answer: Exactly where you left it.

Question: What do you call a cow with three legs?
Answer: Lean Beef.

That got Witnit off of him. It looks like it's anybody's fight at this point. Do you think that WitNit can answer with stupidfunny!

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Flaming Duck - 2; WitNit - 3!

In one fell swoop, WitNit dealt a crushing blow and pulls into the lead! Check the update to Test for Dementia to read the joke that combines pure stupidity with childish grossness.

But wait! All is not lost! Your friendly ignited drake is hurt but not out. Showing obvious pain, he weakly quacks,
Question: What did the snail say as he rode on the turtle's back?

Answer: Wheeee!

What do you think? Did the Flaming Duck pull it out?

Friday, April 08, 2005

Marc Fencil; Student, Marine, Sharp Tongued Writer

Marines letters from Iraq always warm my heart but this is from a Ohio University student turned Marine is especially "touching." Read
Soldiers face real 'die-in' daily in Iraq:

From the letter:
"It's a shame that I'm here in Iraq with the Marines right now and not back at Ohio University completing my senior year and joining in blissful ignorance with the enlightened, war-seasoned protesters who participated in the recent 'die-in' at College Gate. It would appear that all the action is back home, but why don't we make sure? That's right, this is an open invitation for you to cut your hair, take a shower, get in shape and come on over! "

Nuff said. (hat tip Chrenkoff

Flaming Duck – 1; WitNit – 0

Thus endth the first Battle of the Stupid Jokes. The Flaming Duck has successfully defended the title! Though the challenge was clear, WitNit’s stupid joke reservoir was empty and he resorted to ad hominem attacks =;o).

But never fear. Once this duck sets his teeth into something, he never lets go. (of course, duck teeth aren’t that long…). Oh sure, WitNit can write great poetry. He can spew interesting tidbits about how the mind works. He can even give us an intriguing exercise showing the importance of pondering great art. But he can’t TELL A STUPID JOKE. So…

Once again I throw down the gauntlet. Once again, I ask Wit(less)Nit to hit me with his best stupid joke. Once again, I think WitNit will shirk the challenge.

Here’s the first shot!

Just after the break up of the Soviet Union, Rudolph, a former official in the communist party, and his wife, Natasha, were spending a cold December in Siberia. Late in the evening of December 24th, Rudolph opened the door to get more firewood and found that it was raining!

“Natasha, come quick.” Rudolph said, “It is raining in Siberia in December.”

Natasha, not willing to leave the warm fire said, “Rudolph, you must be joking.”

“I am not joking, it’s raining!”

“Are you sure Rudolph? Sometimes snow looks like rain.”

“I am sure,” replied Rudolph. Then he added,

“Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!’

Take that, WitNit!

WitNit, Defend Yourself!

Witnit has posted a stupid test called Test for Dementia. Imagine! The nerve! The Flaming Duck is NAMED AFTER A STUPID JOKE! Who does Witnit THINK HE IS!!!

Prepare to defend yourself, sir!

Intelligence Test for 5 Year Olds.

The test below is designed to test the intelligence of 5 year old children. Let's see how you do.

First Question: You need to put an elephant into a refrigerator. How do you do it?

Answer: You open the door and put the elephant in.

This question is designed to determine if you over think problems. Now for the next question.

Second Question: You need to put a giraffe into the refrigerator. How do you do it?

Answer: You open the door, take the elephant out and put the giraffe in.

This question is designed to test your short term memory. Ok, really concentrate on this next one.

Third Question: The King of the Jungle (the Lion) calls a conference and requires all of the animals to be there. Can you name all the animals in attendance?

Answer: All of them except for the giraffe. Remember, he is still in the refrigerator.

This question shows if you learned anything from Question 2. On to the…

Last Question: You are in the middle of the river and you hit a log which breaks your motor and punctures the hull. The boat is sinking rapidly but the river is known to be inhabited with hungery crocodiles. How do you get to shore?

Answer: You jump into the river and swim safely to shore. Remember, all of the crocodiles are at the conference called by the lion.

Most 5 year-olds will get all of the answers correct. How did you do?

Thursday, April 07, 2005

"Baby Boomers" Strike Again!

Question: "What ever happened to..." the hippies of the 1960's?
Answer: They may have changed their clothes but a "leopard can't change its spots!"

Professor Bainbridge cites a Pew poll about who the Deaniacs are. In the post, he states:
" It turns out they weren't twenty-something neo-hippies or thirty-something slackers. Instead, they're mostly granola-eating, Volvo-driving, Birkenstock-wearing, non-Church-going, tree-hugging, fifty-something Boomer elitists. Or, at least that's how I interpret a Pew survey of them."

Once long ago I read Generations: The History of America's Future, 1584 to 2069 by Neil Howe and William Strauss. While the book was very involved, one of the more interesting points was that generations tended to develop a generational "personality" which does not really change over time.

With that in mind, I want you to think of your stereotypical "baby boomer" of the 1960's. Now, does it really surprise you that the protest marchers of the 60's became the Deaniacs of today?

No "spot change" there!

Ex-Donkey Blog: The Weird Cats Are Watching You

"Weird" does not do them justice.
Ex-Donkey Blog: The Weird Cats Are Watching You

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Conservative Rally Cry for 2008

Sandy Berger. One name, two words, that should become a rallying cry for conservatives in 2008.

Your friendly ignited drake was actually a registered independent until 1999. I spent 20 years of voting willingly letting others chose the candidates while I got involved at the absolute last instant, the actual election. Bill Clinton changed all of that.

The Clinton administration forced me to become involved. And now, the attempt to destroy incriminating evidence only proves that the Clintons are attempting to salvage a failed legacy, probably for political gain in the future. With the MSM as willing accomplices, the full story about the Sandy Berger document destruction episode will probably never be known. But the real story is not about what Sandy Berger did. It is about how far Sandy Berger was willing to fall. This is more than helping the Clintons. It is about taking a bullet.

With the help of the blogosphere and patriots like Dick Morris, maybe, just maybe, we can keep such a corrupt family out of power. Read
this Dick Morris column in the New York Post Online Edition. Take the time to fully understand what Berger was willing to do. Then take special note of the last paragraph:
Any indication by the commission investigating the attack that the Clinton administration hadn't taken terrorism seriously would badly damage the former president's reputation and the former first lady's chances. Any loyal adviser would have worked to mitigate the possible damage. The measure of how serious the damage may have been is how far Berger risked falling to prevent it — and how far he did fall rather than reveal why.

In March of 1836, the rally cry was "Remember the Alamo." In March of 2008 the rally cry should be "Remember Sandy Berger."

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Political Persuasion Test

The Flaming Duck is breaking new ground and has devised a new test to determine whether you are "Leaning Left of Center" or "Rolling Right of Center". Read the article titled, "Iraqi Anthrax Scientist Kept Her Secret" and take note your instinctive response. (hat tip Solomonia)

Now for the scoring.

If you see this as proof positive that the entire Iraq blunder was based on lies and false information and that the US intelligence apparatus is totally incompetent; you are a liberal.

If you see this as more proof that there were significant violations of Resolution 1441, there certainly were (and still might be) WMD in Iraq and that the invasion was definitely justified; you are a conservative.

So how did you score?

Monday, April 04, 2005

Wizbang Caption Contest



Why Do You Blog?

Question: Why do YOU Blog?
Answer: (I'm waiting...)

Professor Steven Taylor over at PoliBlog attended a recent conference at which he sat on a panel about blogging. There are several post about the panel, all very interesting, but the most recent caught my eye. A student apparently asked why each of the panelists maintained a blog, insinuating that there must be money in it. In his answer, Dr. Taylor talks about passion and the desire obtain and pass on knowledge. He closes the post with
"I like ideas, I like words; hence, I blog."

I guess I blog to "put out the fire."

So why do you blog? Is it money, passion, hidden agendas, boredom ...?

Friday, April 01, 2005

Today's Teaser

Question: What's the difference between wisdom and intelligence?
Answer: And which is better? (sorry, I guess I am channeling Socrates at the moment.)

I'll post my own thoughts in a day or two. Until then, leave a comment with your own definitions.

Update: I thought that I would seed the discussion with the dictionary definitions. The definitions most applicable to our discussion are quoted below but, in the interest of full disclosure, I linked the full page for each word.

The definition for Wisdom.
1 a : accumulated philosophic or scientific learning : KNOWLEDGE b : ability to discern inner qualities and relationships : INSIGHT c : good sense

The definition for Intelligence.
1 a (1) : the ability to learn or understand or to deal with new or trying situations : REASON; also : the skilled use of reason (2) : the ability to apply knowledge to manipulate one's environment or to think abstractly as measured by objective criteria (as tests)

In the comments, Mark Alexander says
Intelligence is a thinking. Wisdom is a knowing.

As for me, I associate intelligence with reason and the scientific method. Wisdom I associate with understanding and appropriate action.

So I ask again. What is the difference and which is better?

Update: It's the weekend (or almost) and it is wisdom that I should finish this post. I want to start with a quote from Mason Cooley:
Intelligence complicates. Wisdom simplifies.
In four words, Mason Cooley succinctly describes a concept that is extremely difficult to put into words.

I think that intelligence is about your ability to learn and how much you have learned. Wisdom is about what you do with you learn. Intelligence is about the individual seeking theories, facts and figures. Wisdom is about using all that one has learned to live a good life and touch those around you in a positive way.

E. F. Schumacher described three stages in life. In the first stage, a man comes home and asks "What's for dinner?" In the second stage, a man comes home and wonders how dinner fits into the universe. He wonders what's right or wrong about dinner and tries to make others see what he has discovered. In the third stage, a man comes home and asks, "What's for dinner?" not because he is incapable of deep thought but because he already understands "dinner" and right now he is hungery. The first stage is innocent man, one without knowledge. The second stage is an intelligent man, seeking and learning. The third stage is a wise man; one who understands.

Have you ever known an intelligent person? Have you ever known a wise person? Do you think that my descriptions are accurate?

Which is better? I think wisdom is better.